Checkmate Episode 32 (By Adeyoola Ojemola)

 

Theresa didn’t sleep either. She remembered looking at how Gideon was very attentive to Bisi and Joshua to the pregnant Daniella after dinner. She had never longed for marriage as much as she did tonight. She had prayed about her marriage and she trusted God with it. She was certain her Father would give her His best son most suitable for her. 

 

 

 

But with the manner of events that had surrounded her and all that transpired in the course of the day with Daniella and Mummy Bisi and everyone else having someone to share intimate heart talks with, she felt her heart ache.

 

The honest truth is that no man had asked to court her before. At first she was worried but mummy Ojo assured her that she was perfectly normal and that God certainly was preserving her from unnecessary heart aches and from the roaring lions seeking who to devour. 

 

She was just so restless as she laid on the bed. She was in the room she often slept in whenever she stayed over with the Ojos. Daddy and mummy Ojo had so much changed and transformed her perspective about marriage and they made her want what they had.

 

The marriage between her dad and her step-mum was never anything to admire or long for considering the fact that her step-mum never showed her any love whatsoever. There were times that she wondered who married who between her dad and the step-mum because she seemed to be the one ruling their home.

 

Catch up with Episode 2

 

Theresa’s dad did travel a lot of time but it now dawns on her that he chose to stay out of his home not primarily because his job kept him out that much. As a driver, the company he worked for often rotated shifts among their long distance and heavy vehicle drivers so that their health can be well maintained. 

 

But as she has gotten older and reflected on the relationship between him and his wife, she understands the situation better. For one, her dad needed to get his wife’s permission before he could do anything for her, his daughter. Occasionally, he would come to her school unannounced, give her a little bit of cash and a knowing look to never mention it to his wife and keep it away from her sight. 

 

Theresa was caught one time with some money her father had come to give her the previous day at school. She had told her dad that she needed money to buy some school supplies and personal items but did not dare ask her step-mum. He came to her school before travelling and gave her as much as she needed. 

 

She planned to go to the market with it during the weekend as she would usually go grocery shopping. That was her mistake. Her step-mum found the money tucked in one of her school books in her school sack. Her step-mum claimed the money was hers and nothing Theresa said justified her. 

 

Her step-mum beat her blue-black, used a razor on her back, and laced the cuts with some pepper.  She was in brutal pain. None of that stopped her from doing all the chores she had to complete. There was no one to save Theresa.

 

When her dad came home, her step-mum gave him hot! She even slapped him when he raised his voice at her, telling her he gave his daughter the money. Theresa was highly disappointed in her dad for not being able to stand up for himself and for her. She stopped expecting anything from him after then till his death.

 

At the thought of her step mum, she wondered what had become of the woman and her step-siblings. Dismissing their thoughts from her heart, Theresa ruminated on what marriage should be like and the kind that she wanted. 

 

There was a time she went to make the hair of a client at home. The moment the woman heard the sound of her husband’s car parking in the compound. She hurriedly stood up, tidied the already tidy living room. They were at the balcony of the living room. 

 

She checked herself to be sure she was okay in her dress. Then she said to Theresa, ‘Don’t look him in the eyes or talk to him. If he speaks to you, look down while you respond. When he goes up stairs, you can leave. We will continue tomorrow. I’ll explain to your boss. Don’t worry, I’ll pay.’

 

Theresa understood the fuss when the man stepped into the house. His aura was cold and unwelcoming. He looked at his wife who greeted him as though terror walked in and he barely managed a grunt in response. 

 

He noticed Theresa, gave her a quick and condescending glance and walked away towards the stairs. The wife waved Theresa off as she followed her husband. Theresa kept praying as she went her way saying, ‘I won’t marry such a man in Jesus name’.

 

Another time, at the saloon, the other girls were gossiping about a customer they were expecting that day. One of the girls dared the others to bet that the woman was going to come with bruises on her face with some patch-up make-up attempt. Another said that the husband will come with her and wait till her hair is done. 

 

Theresa who was busy sorting some hair supplies could not excuse herself away from them so she listened. Theresa noticed the woman’s face but never connected the dots that her husband may be abusive towards her until the other girls mentioned it, jesting about it. 

 

When the woman showed up, not only were there bruises on her face, her husband also showed up with her and sat waiting till they were done. The man was acting all lovey-dovey, picking the hairstyle, paying up front before the hair began and paying for some snacks for the both of them. Theresa stole a glance at the woman but  her face was expressionless as though no life. Theresa found sadness in those dull eyes.

 

She remembered mummy Ojo telling her that the subject of God’s will in marriage can be simply expressed as God’s choice for her in marriage. Mummy Ojo had told her that it meant God doing the choosing and she, like Mary, responded that His will be done without question.

 

Theresa had asked her then that what if God was choosing a may way shorter than her as His choice or a man from a different ethnicity. Mummy Ojo had told her, anyone, so long it was certainly God, would always be the best choice. 

 

Mummy Ojo had asked her what was most important in a marriage. Theresa gave a series of responses and each time, mummy Ojo would shake her head to say a no. Theresa mentioned love, financial stability, respect, honour, a wife who was a homemaker and husband a provider…

 

Theresa would never forget the response from mummy Ojo that day. Mummy had lovingly stood up from opposite Theresa to sit right by her side. She held her hand and lovingly said, Christ. Christ is the most important to find in a marriage. Theresa looked confused yet had a knowing within her that she was right.

 

Mummy Ojo emphasised that if God was allowed to choose spouses for His children and His children yield to Him in wholehearted obedience, Christ can never be far away in that home. In fact, Christ would host that marriage in heavenly union with the same oneness that exists in the Trinity.

 

She explained further that the relationship the Trinity share is rooted in Their Oneness. The Author of the Bible says that marriage is the forging of two into one. They are to do life in one accord and everything they do binds them to each other.

 

It is the kind of oneness that births creation in alignment with God’s intentions. It is a terrain that gives God access to establish His kingdom on earth, as already established in heaven.

 

Theresa wants that. Theresa wants a home that God is proud of, a marriage that has the fullness of God in it. She has been learning a lot from Bisi Ojo and her heart is resolved to do it God’s way. The problem with those other marriages including her dad and his wife, was the absence of Jesus to guide them into oneness. 

 

However, tonight, she is so overwhelmed at the thought of being alone. The Ojo’s will be leaving for a long while and unless they invite her over, she may not see them for a very long while. Joshua and Daniella on the other side are wonderful people she is getting to know more and more. But with the turn of events in their home, she is not sure what the future will be like for them.

 

She wipes a tear that escaped her eyes absent-mindedly as she sat up on the bed. ‘What next Lord?’ She said audibly. Yes, she told Bisi Ojo that she would like to go back to school but where is she going to start from? She has not studied since leaving secondary school. Yes she has been reading vast and wide since meeting the Ojos but it’s nothing compared to academic work with exams, grading and application. 

 

Theresa is certain the Ojo’s would sponsor her education and she is most grateful for that. But the thought of it and taking actions is what she dreads. I know I certainly need to enrol for personal coaching but where will I find someone who will be understanding and patient with me in case I am not catching up as I should. 

 

I also need guidance on what to study. Back when I was in secondary school, I had thought about accounting but I lack the confidence to think I can attempt that course now or any other course for that matter. 

 

By this time, Theresa was already on her knees by the bed side. She began to pray for the Lord to guide her. She began to ask that the Lord will establish His will in her life. She began to ask that God will order her steps in the right direction, instructing her each time.

 

Theresa prayed that God would assure her of His intentionality about her marriage and calm her heart with His peace. She asked that God should lead her into the right career path now that she feels convinced it is time to head to school. As she kept praying, she dozed off! Theresa had a dream.

 

Theresa saw herself sitting opposite a young lady who was teaching her the English alphabet. The young woman, very beautiful, spoke with such a soft and calm voice, very patiently. Soon, the woman finished with her and they both stood from their chairs and gave each other a hug. 

 

 

As soon as they were done, Theresa felt someone looking at her. The person was standing a little distance from the woman hugging her as though waiting for her to finish with the woman. It was not a look that made her feel uneasy. As she looked up to see who was looking at her, she woke from her dream.

 

Theresa was first unsure what had happened. She took about three seconds to realise she had dozed off in the place of prayer. But as soon as she had that thought, she remembered that she had a dream. She reflected on the dream and saw that it was a good one. The Lord was confirming to her that He approves of her prayers. 

 

Theresa began to pray the dream into manifestation, asking that God will lead her to the right person God has ordained to make the journey ahead smooth for her. 

 

 

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Wheeeeew! 

What is your own view on Biblical Marriage? 

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Checkmate Episode 33